In such uncertain times, we're not sure whose side to take: the guy with the pepper spray (got the best Cyber Monday deals) or the guy getting pepper sprayed (didn't get any Cyber Monday deals because he couldn't see the screen). So we'll just keep to ourselves over here behind the counter at the Mobile Menagerie kiosk at the mall and talk about Angry Birds and what kind of pagers we keep in our nightstands to remind us of what it was like back in the day when it was so much realer.

Song: El Remolón - Riki Tiki (ZZK Records)