EA: "Our Horror Game Was Too Scary!"

From GAF: EA thought Dead Space was too scary. That's why they added co-op. Please, for the love of Mike, click the link and read the OP in the GAF thread.

My response on GAF is as follows:

At first they were like "snow!" and I was all "well, I prefer darkness and space, but I guess you could do snow at night, or maybe snowblindness or something."

Then they said "fighting humans! cover systems! universal ammo!" and I was all "well, the worst sequel ever had universal ammo and that's what made it the worst sequel ever... but I don't mind fighting enemies, or even using cover against enemies with guns. As long as they balance it right--so that guns do a LOT of damage, but your health and the necromorph damage remains unchanged from previous games (meaning that you only need to enter cover when facing an enemy with a gun, while the rest of the gameplay feels identical to previous Dead Space games), I can see it working out fine."

Then they were like "co-op!" and I was all "alright, um... I can see this working, maybe, but terror, which is what most people really want in a horror game, works best when players feel vulnerable, and co-op doesn't do that."


Fucking now?

I actually want to torture someone over the internet, and not, like, regular torture. I'm talking real, pure, genuine torture. I'm talking strapping someone to a chair and making her watch the entire X-Files. At first, she'd be confused. Later, she'd laugh, thinking that it wasn't a torture at all. Then... oh yes, then the torture begins. Slowly, the realization would dawn that it's not quite as good as it had been, and, by the time the show ends, she'll be a gibbering, screaming wreck, horrified at what the X-Files became.

But no seriously, I do think someone needs to slap her in the face and ask her if she has any idea what a goddamn genre is. She might as well be saying "well, turns out that the broader audience doesn't like horses all that much, so we made a Western without them."

It's okay to not bring in Call of Duty numbers. Destroying a brand's identity for the sake of some mythical userbase that isn't going to show up (most of the people I know who prefer Call of Duty to other games do so because they actually prefer that things be more grounded, similar to the audiences of police procedurals and CBS sitcoms, be in first person, and run at 60FPS) is one of the most creatively bankrupt and ideologically absurd ideas an entertainment company can have.

Imagine if slasher pics didn't have any blood in them! Imagine a romantic comedy where the woman got what she deserved! Imagine sports films where the team loses after an inspiring speech! Removing the sense of terror from Dead Space is just as stupid. Imagine a mob film where no one gets hurt! Imagine an Indiana Jones film without a sense of adventure!

I'm actually angry for once. CATER TO YOUR AUDIENCE!