T-Mobile, their LTE launch, their Nexus 4's, and Chris Ziegler

I have a conspiracy theory. It goes like this.

Sure, it's possible that Google disabled LTE on the Nexus 4 for regulatory reasons. But what if there were nefarious reasons as well? Perhaps nefarious is the wrong word; in truth, I just like writing "nefarious." I mean, "nefarious" . . . that just never stops feeling good. But anyways.

Is it a coincidence that the only LTE bands that the Nexus 4 supports in hardware are the AWS set, which is exactly what will be used by T-Mobile in their LTE rollout? I THINK NOT.

Why, I'm going to make the mostly unsubstantiated claim here that upon the launch of T-Mobile's LTE strata, the Nexus 4 will have it's LTE capabilities re-enabled. But wait! Don't break out the champagne just yet. I am going to also claim&emdash;with even less to back me up, but with no less warrantless confidence&emdash;that only Nexus 4's purchased from T-Mobile will regain their LTE birthright.

Why, do you ask? Did you not read the part where I mentioned these claims of mine were unsubstantiated and purely speculative? So, I dunno. Maybe it'll turn out to be thanks to regulatory hoops that T-Mobile is able to jump through by Google themselves cannot. Maybe it's the Illuminati. Maybe sunspots. But I can feel it in my bones.

And in this troubled golden age, kindof like a utopia pizza spoiled by the unwelcome addition of the mushrooms of dystopia&emdash;shut up, mushrooms are gross on pizza&emdash;one man will stand triumphant. And that man will be The Verge's Chris Ziegler, He of the Inordinately Expensive Nexus 4. For his, alone amongst the Verge staff (and really most rational consumers) will be That With LTE.

And I won't really care since I live in Canada and my 3G-only carrier seems to often give HSPA+ speeds better than (or at least comparable to) the markets in the U.S. whose LTE networks are saturated. But anyways. When this totally happens, I told ya so.