If you can't even get to inbox zero, what can you do?

In a series of posts where I get pissed off at you for your revolting tech habits, let me take a moment to express my utter contempt for Mr 65 unread.

Keeping your inbox clean is not hard. Unsubscribe to that new '25% off Squirrel Gonads today!' email the second you get it there and then, bask in the godliness of inbox zero. If you're a sinner, go away, spend 15mins unsubscribing to everything you can and then spend the 5-freaking-minutes-a-month maintaining it. There is no excuse. Stay strong through the super obnoxious 'please sign in to update your mail settings', pay attention to tick the correct 'Do not, not check this box to not receive mail from us' and all will be golden.

The next person I see with 104 unread emails gets their phone punted across the floor. You are not Joshua Topolsky, you do not get that many emails a day.