Jerry Seinfeld headed to the new Tonight Show earlier this week to perform a few minutes of standup, and he spent a good portion of that time talking about the bizarre ways in which we interact with phones. "There is no safety, there is no comfort, there is no security for you in this life anymore," Seinfeld jokes, "unless when you're walking down the street you can feel a hard rectangle in your pants."

His observations about our surprisingly anti-social use of a social device aren't all new in their own right, but Seinfeld does a predictably great job shining a new light on how we go about using our phones, Seinfeld also contrasts the new technology with the continually failing and increasingly dated Postal Service. Watch it below, and you'll never think about scrolling on a smartphone the same way ever again.