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This DJ Khaled text generator lays life's banalities bare

This DJ Khaled text generator lays life's banalities bare

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'Every chance I get, I water the plants. Lion! They never said winning was easy.'

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Have you dabbled in graphic design? Do you enjoy the inspirational stylings of Snapchat storytelling pioneer DJ Khaled? If you answered "yes" to either of these questions, you'll probably like Lyft designer Patrick Wong's Khaled Ipsum text generator. Wong wanted "to learn some more JavaScript and to experiment with CSS flexbox"; he ended up producing potent commentary on contemporary content creation.

If you're unfamiliar with lorem ipsum, you should know it's useless, garbled Latin that designers use to fill space in something they're making; it's placeholder text, devoid of meaning and valuable for its visual significance. If you're also somehow unfamiliar with DJ Khaled, you should know he's veteran record producer, a seasoned radio host, a networker nonpareil, and an internet sensation. His Snapchat story — the one with the well-watered plants, the major keys to success, and the Jet Ski odyssey — has spawned a collection of phrases professional content producers use to fill spaces in their websites. It's valuable because it makes people laugh and earns their fleeting attention; it's also meaningless garble.

Wong's Khaled Ipsum takes Khaled's vague platitudes regarding horticulture, self-empowerment, and the power of cocoa butter and repurposes them, turning their collective lack of meaning into a strength. It's a cool, funny idea, one that ends up highlighting how bone-deep banal Khaled's keys to success really are. Here's a sample:

The key to more success is to get a massage once a week, very important, major key, cloth talk. To succeed you must believe. When you believe, you will succeed. Find peace, life is like a water fall, you’ve gotta flow. Put it this way, it took me twenty five years to get these plants, twenty five years of blood sweat and tears, and I’m never giving up, I’m just getting started. In life you have to take the trash out, if you have trash in your life, take it out, throw it away, get rid of it, major key.

If you want some copy for your next web design project or for your own personal amusement, you can generate 10 paragraphs at a time right here. Bless up.