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Our favorite reviews of Melanie's Marvelous Measles

Our favorite reviews of Melanie's Marvelous Measles


"The way I see it, if they go blind or die, it was meant to be. No more silly, man-made interference with nature for my family!"

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Measles sickens and kills people around the world every year. But Stephanie Messenger, author of Melanie's Marvelous Measles, feels we're being way too nervous about exposing our children to preventable illnesses that could make them wretchedly uncomfortable, blind, or dead. From her author information on Amazon:

Melanie's Marvelous Measles was written to educate children on the benefits of having measles and how you can heal from them naturally and successfully. Often today, we are being bombarded with messages from vested interests to fear all diseases in order for someone to sell some potion or vaccine, when, in fact, history shows that in industrialized countries, these diseases are quite benign and, according to natural health sources, beneficial to the body. Having raised three children vaccine-free and childhood disease-free, I have experienced many times when my children's vaccinated peers succumb to the childhood diseases they were vaccinated against. Surprisingly, there were times when my unvaccinated children were blamed for their peers' sickness.

My dad had measles as a kid; he was born before the push for vaccination started in 1963. Dad didn't have marvelous measles — he had miserable measles, and he didn't much enjoy the other childhood diseases he caught, either. I was, of course, vaccinated; my father didn't see why I should suffer, as he is a good father (full disclosure: we are related; my four younger siblings are also fully vaccinated). That puts my dad ahead of Stephanie Messenger and the other abusive parents who are willing to let their children risk death — and have other, vulnerable people risk infection — because they have been taken with the naturalistic fallacy. (By the way: arsenic is natural, but I'd hesitate before giving it to a kid.)

Gotta hear both sides though! Here's what the five-star reviews say about Melanie's Marvelous Measles:

Finally! A children's book with an agenda I can get behind! I always thought I loved kids until I actually had one of my own and boy was I wrong! I researched anything and everything I could possibly do to get rid of the little brat, but I didn't want to be arrested for murder and childhood cancer is just too darn unpredictable. Fortunately, I stumbled upon "Melanie's Marvelous Measles," and learned that there is a huge community of people who hate children as much as me! Thanks to Melanie, I was able to ignore my pediatrician's recommendations to vaccinate my daughter before our trip to Disney World, all while acting like I want what is "best" for my child.

- brittany

The author explores the wondrous theme of how highly contagious, deadly diseases are beneficial in nature, such as through natural selection. They can also be beautiful. Little-known fact: Georges Seurat's La Grande Jatte was inspired by the pretty spots he saw on the faces of dying Parisians before the advent of that dastardly measles vaccine. Killing yourself, your children, and others is our right as Americans. Thank the gods for authors willing to tell this beautiful story and help kill children.- slashjc

As a carpenter who specializes in itty bitty coffins I can't say enough good things about this book, my customer base has been growing at an epidemic rate!- Sandra Bradley

Other reviewers suggested other books for Messenger's series:

Don't overlook the lesser known Dr. Seuss books in this series — "Horton hears an air raid siren," "Oh the places you'll itch," "How the Grinch caught Chlamydia," "And to Think That I Contracted It on Mulberry Street," "Skull Fracture Mayzie," "Hop on your remaining foot," " The 500 days in ICU of Bartholomew Cubbins," and "If I Ran the Mortuary."- Nathaniel E Parkinson II

If you enjoyed this book, check out these other fine titles from the same author:
Abby's Absolutely Abundant Abscess
Addie's Adorable Adenoma
Adelia's Addled Alzheimer's
Andy's Amazing AIDS
Anne's Incandescent Anorexia
Annette's Astonishing Aneurysm
Annie's Awesome Asthma
Arnie's Artful Addiction
Barack's Baroque Barbiturate Overdose
Barry's Bitchin' Beri Beri
Beatrice's Bawdy Bronchitis
Bella's Beloved Bell's Palsy
Bennett's Breathtaking Boil
Bertha's Blossoming Bulimia
Billy's Bodacious Botulism
Bobby's Bitchin' Bubonic Plague
Bobby's Bubbling Buboes
Bob's Bodacious Bone Break
Boris's Big Blister
Bradley's Brilliant Bradycardia- Michael J. Gogulski, whose list continues

I see a lot of ordinarily serious people arguing that we should be kinder to anti-vaccine believers; they are doing what they believe is best for their kids, I'm told. Maybe they are. But I don't believe in evaluating actions based on intent; no drunk driver intends to run a child over, after all. And that's who those in denial of the benefits of vaccines are: drunk drivers, unable or unwilling to see that they're putting everyone else's lives at risk. You need look no further than the Disneyland outbreak to see the consequences of their good intentions: human suffering.