Sometimes there comes a moment in every internet writer's life where a headline seems too perfect to be true — but really, truly is the greatest thing ever. Sure, many situations of ludicrously fun headlines arise and are shot down by important journalistic questions like Is this fair? Is this accurate? and Is this unnecessarily lewd?
This is not technically one of those situations. Apple did, in fact, remove "50 gallon drum of lube" from an image shown on stage at WWDC. Only, it wasn't an actual 50 gallon drum of lube so much as it was the phrase "50 gallon drum of lube" (as verified by this Cleveland Indians tweet from June 2nd). For comparison:
@CaseyNewton Apple shopped #Windians ransom note, modding Zeps request to be more family friendly. #WWDC15 pic.twitter.com/53QglKS7H8— Andrew Martin (@andrewcmartin) June 8, 2015
As part of a rousing and enthusiastic introduction to the WWDC keynote, Apple CEO Tim Cook recalled the story of Cleveland Indians outfielder Brandon Moss hitting his 100th home run right into the Indians bullpen — and the subsequent list of demands his teammates gave him in return for the ball. Most of those, it turns out, were Apple related: iPhones, iPads ("or $5,000 cash"), Macbook Airs, and Apple Watches. Moss, in fact, did hit his 100th home run, and Apple reportedly gifted the Indians players their Apple requests (in addition to gifting Moss his 100th home run baseball).
But did relief pitcher Marc Rzepczynski (aka "Zep") get his Apple Watch and his 50 gallon drum of lube? We're guessing no. Not from Apple, at least.
Verge Video: Apple's incremental improvements at WWDC 2015