Peas in guacamole? The New York Times says yes:
Add green peas to your guacamole. Trust us. http://t.co/7imMY9c2ph pic.twitter.com/oeOMt2qgmh
— The New York Times (@nytimes) July 1, 2015
For obvious reasons this will widely be considered the worst and most irresponsible New York Times story in history. You don't put peas in guacamole. Guacamole is no ship of Theseus; you can't take out an onion here or a jalapeño there and replace them with peas. It is an unspoken law: one so obvious and essential, that upon considering even for the first time the marriage of peas and guac, one will discover the self-evident truth that the union is unholy.
The indignity of peas in guacamole is so uncontroversial that even people named Bush and people named Obama are able to find common ground.
respect the nyt, but not buying peas in guac. onions, garlic, hot peppers. classic. https://t.co/MEEI8QHH1V
— President Obama (@POTUS) July 1, 2015
You don't put peas in guacamole https://t.co/kG3ewrVv6f
— Jeb Bush (@JebBush) July 1, 2015
Peas in guac may, however, become a reliable litmus test for the sanity of elected officials. We'll update this story as additional candidates disclose their views...
Except for Donald Trump. We probably already know how he feels.