Oh, Nintendo of America. You sweet summer child. I really appreciate your efforts for a cute Toad-centric Twitter question sesh to celebrate another Mario Party game, but things have taken a dark turn. As if you were the second coming of Andrew WK, you solicited fans for questions about parties. But your request has been manipulated into something else. Fans are going straight for the deep stuff; the hard, prying, existential questions that we all ask ourselves deep in the pits of despair.
Come to think of it, this actually sounds like a lot of parties I end up at.
do you have very short legs or are your feet directly attached to your hips #AskToad— erin (@noiverns) November 3, 2016
(Oh wait, I think we have an answer for this one.)
OK, back to our questions.
@NintendoAmerica when is mother 3 coming to america— ☃️MOTHER Universe (@MOTHERverse) November 3, 2016
Well, this rapidly spiraled. Maybe once Toad starts answering it’ll —
If you’re going to throw a party, make sure to pick up party hats for all your friends! pic.twitter.com/vf7hSG7THy— Nintendo of America (@NintendoAmerica) November 3, 2016
Ah. Well, nevermind.
@NintendoAmerica Is the implication here Toad has no friends, because no one else has hats— PLDH.net (@PLDHnet) November 3, 2016
@NintendoAmerica are you asking us to live a life of celibacy toad, jesus christ man.— William Carpenter (@WillCarpenterJR) November 3, 2016
Sorry, buddy. I’m sure you have friends. But first, can you answer this question?