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Don't do this to your tongue, please

The Verge likes The Slow Mo Guys, but we can't endorse their latest video, in which one man unleashes the full wrath of a mousetrap upon his vulnerable tongue. That man is YouTube maker and, in this case, amateur stuntman Daniel Gruchy, who approaches the "experiment" with an appropriate mix of anxiety and disgust. As you expect, the bit doesn't end well. Fortunately for us, we can learn from Gruchy's mistake, above, in excruciating slow-motion.

There isn't a squirt of blood, to my relief. Instead, saliva jettisons from Gruchy's tongue, like a thousand tiny space shuttles departing from Planet Mouth as it's annihilated by a long metal rod. Actually, you know when a boxer's face is on the receiving end of a haymaker, and sweat skitters into the air: the boxer in this case is Gruchy's tongue.

Your empathy pains will require some soothing. Slow-motion jelly whacking should do the trick.