Anyone who has spent the last several months squinting at poorly-lit Game of Thrones trailers knows that we have a very gory summer of television ahead. Knees will be sliced! Heads will be plucked from their bodies! Someone will say "spill blood," and blood, I suspect, will be spilled! At the center of all that gore, if the gods are good, will be Sansa Stark.
Sansa has it all — tons of enemies who are not sympathetic characters, an extremely thrilling new badass aesthetic, and lots of fire lines to drop about what has been taken from her. We've waited five years to see her mess up some of the people who have ruined her life and killed most of her family, and it looks like some Sansa revenge might finally come to pass. It will be the best thing to happen to women since Tina Lawson looked at Mathew Knowles sideways.
tfw you are about to kill all men pic.twitter.com/Qy0LZbEajk— tc (@chillmage) April 11, 2016
As it happens, the actress who portrays Sansa, Sophie Turner, also has it all.
lock up your husbands (if they are freys!)
In the above video she is sporting an extremely thrilling Victorian chic / Renaissance goth / Balmain wizard look, doing a pretty good impression of Kit Harington's marble-mouthed Jon Snow, and lip-syncing to what is undeniably the greatest song Justin Bieber has ever recorded. She does not shy away from physical comedy, and makes a lot of jokes that don't really land. She is brave and beautiful. She exhibits a Drake-level awareness of how to make good internet content, but none of Drake's signature self-absorption. I love her.
Sophie Turner will also appear in the upcoming film X-Men: Apocalypse, which opens May 27th — one month after she begins her Westerosi parade of death and destruction. I assume this movie will be as middling as all of the X-Men movies, but not while she is on the screen.
I would enjoy a supercut of Sansa's most male-destroying glares set to this Martina McBride kiss-off track.