It's hard to believe that there's only one episode left in season six of Game of Thrones, mainly because I have no memory of what my life was like before this season began. What did I do on Sundays? What did I think about for many, many hours at work? How did I steer conversations toward Kit Harington's perfect face?
[SPOILERS FOR GAME OF THRONES AND A SONG OF ICE AND FIRE BELOW]
Yet, here we are, and the finale looks terrible. Can you believe that Daario is in this teaser? Can you believe that Daario is on Game of Thrones? The only explanation I will accept for his presence is that he's being dumped by Daenerys, in favor of other romantic pursuits.
We also see Tommen's crown being set upon his head very slowly by a faceless person standing behind him, which is an interesting behind-the-scenes look at how Tommen gets dressed in the morning but I'm not sure why it's so dramatic.
The High Sparrow asks Cersei, Margaery, and Loras if they're ready to "stand trial and profess guilt or innocence before the Seven," begging the question — what are trials? You still go to trial when you plead guilty? Getting rid of trial by combat was a good step but the Westerosi justice system still has some absurdities to work out.
As we might have guessed, all of the men in Sansa's life that she hasn't murdered are all up in her grill. Jon asks her to stop keeping secrets from him, because they have a lot of enemies. Sansa very charitably declines to remind Jon that they would have way more enemies if it weren't for her secrets, and also he'd be dead.
Later, Sansa is enjoying some quiet time under a Weirwood, which for the Starks is a "praying to the Old Gods zone," when Littlefinger strides up, rude as anything, and demands that she talk to him. "What do you want?" she asks. "I thought you knew what I wanted," he says, even though absolutely no one knows what he wants and that's his main character trait. Sansa gives him a look that says "I don't have time to teach you how to vocalize your emotions, and stop lusting after me while you're at it."
I truly hope these scenes are anomalies, because this whole episode should really be shot after shot of Sansa being presented with baked goods and T-shirts with her face on them as thanks for burying Ramsay last week (for all of us!).
Davos is still worked up about little Shireen getting crisped over a year ago (which he conveniently forgot about for eight episodes, but by all means, take up room in the finale over it), and Daenerys is still worked up about how poorly equipped she is to invade and rule Westeros. Tyrion gets the money line, with a cutesy little reference to the "great game" which is "terrifying," and also the name of the show! I always get a little shiver whenever characters make reference to the name of the show they're on, don't you? Like when Ted Mosby would say "how I met your mother" at the beginning of every episode of How I Met Your Mother. Or when Meredith Grey's last name would always be Grey on every episode of Grey's Anatomy. Excellent writing!
who is walder frey sending his regards to? the people he's standing right in front of?
Most importantly for Lady Stonheart truthers: we see a shot of a Frey dinner party, with Walder Frey shouting "the Freys and Lannisters send their regards!" It's a callback to Roose Bolton's season three line "the Lannisters send their regards," which he whispers in Robb Stark's ear while he stabs him. It's interesting that Walder Frey would make that reference, since there is no way he was in earshot. What that tells me is that Roose Bolton went up to Walder afterwards for some locker room talk: "Man, it was so badass, I was like 'The Lannisters send their regards,' and then I just stabbed him right up, but like, I let the words soak in first and he was pissssssed. [slaps table] GOD, I'm so HYPED, let's cut off his wolf's head and sew it to him MURRRDDERRRRR." Cool.
Jamie is at this dinner party, along with a buttload of Freys. All of these people experienced either murder or attempted murder at the hands of one undead Catelyn Stark in the books, and these shots are a direct visual reference to the scene of her death. If she doesn't show up, I hope she's at least turning in her grave because everyone in Westeros is so obsessed with her and hasn't been able to stop talking about her all season.
Just think: a week from now we will know all. Most of us will be disappointed, and the rest of us will be writing think pieces.