Just when you thought there would be no Song of the Summer for Summer '16, a savior descends.
And that savior is my teammate in social media management, The Verge's Dami Lee. She found this little ditty on YouTube called "Can I Get a Box?" You really need to listen to it to understand. It's very...
"I've been a server for 5 years. I made a song about the way white girls ask me for boxes," says Joy Brooker, the songstress behind "Can I Get a Box?" The song is what some might call "a banger." It is what Tumblr teens might call "the spiritual successor to 'Shoes.'" It is what Lauren Conrad might call "[eyeroll]."
It is what Dami — channeling Zane Lowe of Beats One radio — has called "A MASSIVE CHUNE." It is what I might call "available on iTunes," so please go ahead and download it onto all your devices right now.
This song has all the neon-tinted derpiness of last summer's "What Do You Mean?" It has all of the dance floor weep session possibilities of 2013's "Rolling in the Deep." All of the high art genre-bending of "Cruise" by Florida Georgia Line ft. Nelly. All of the biting social commentary of MAGIC!'s "Rude." All the brave existential question asking of 2005's "Don't Cha?" It is in short, the perfect summer jam. It will live forever.
it will live forever
I don't know if Brooker is looking for help in writing her 2017 sophomore hit "What's your darkest roast?" about the plight of the American mall food court coffee shop employee, but if so I would happily offer up some lyrics in exchange for a "feat. @kait_tiffany." We could set it to the tune of "Hotline Bling" in honor of my coworker Dami Lee, who uses "Hotline Bling (Marimba Remix)" as her ringtone.
[fumbles with change] "CAN YOU TELL I HAVEN'T HAD MY COFFEE YET?!"
"OH, WHAT TIME DOES JCPENNEY'S OPEN?"
"NOT TOO SWEET, OKAY HONEY?"
"CAN I GET THAT EXTRA HOT."
Feel free to enjoy the rest of your summer in peace now that our collective horrible lack has been rectified!