If you're not familiar with the antics of dancing pumpkin man, then just reread the three words that come before the comma in this very sentence. In short: he is a man wearing a pumpkin mask that dances. Let me phrase that another way: he is a pumpkin-faced human male who cannot resist the rhythmic lure of music. He is, more prosaically, a 90-second goof created by TV anchor Matt Geiler that was uploaded to YouTube in '06 and that reels in new and delighted (and aroused?) viewers every October. And he's got some new jams.
Twitter account @dancingpmkin has been doing the word of the October gods, preparing us for dancing pumpkin man's traditional, seasonal ascendance by uploading videos of The Dance matched with different songs. You might carp that we've jumped the gun a little here, starting the October vibes in early September, or that people have been mixing up dancing pumpkin man to songs on YouTube for ages (they have) but the goods, at least, are solid.
Here's DPM dancing to Nintendo's Wii music
Wii Music pic.twitter.com/1lGW0NWNQA— pumpkin dancing to (@dancingpmkin) September 4, 2016
And Desiigner's "Panda"
Panda - Desiigner pic.twitter.com/HXct3zV8hx— pumpkin dancing to (@dancingpmkin) September 6, 2016
Choo, choo, it's the Thomas the Tank Engine theme song
Thomas The Train Engine Theme Song pic.twitter.com/amwyQgmTzD— pumpkin dancing to (@dancingpmkin) September 4, 2016
And — utterly sensationally — "My Neck, My Back" by Khia
My Neck, My Back - Khai pic.twitter.com/E06A4Jl8gt— pumpkin dancing to (@dancingpmkin) September 4, 2016
I think we can all agree that at this point, dancing pumpkin man has transcended being merely an avatar of the season, to become the very essence of eroticism.