One day we will tell our children, "Phones used to come with a headphone jack and a charging port." They'll guffaw, but then they'll look deep in our somber eyes and know we tell the truth.
They'll ask, "How did you use all your old headphones with those silly cylindrical connectors, cyborgparent?"
And that's when you'll get to tell them about the vibrant third-party adapter ecosystem that sprung up after Apple's introduction of the long-rumored single plug iPhone 7.
"These renders of Chinese headphone adapters," you'll say through your voice synthesizer that prompts a 6 percent boost in trustworthiness among your progeny, "were the first sign of what was to come. We should've heeded their warnings."
"We will learn from your mistakes and become stronger," your children will say. But children always say that. They never learn.