When headphone jacks were withheld from smartphones by our all-knowing corporate overlords, we were promised a wireless future as compensation. But in addition to battery life hassle, subpar audio quality, and pairing woes, Bluetooth headphones have one more major drawback: they aren’t Koss Porta Pros.
Koss’s Porta Pro headphones are the greatest headphones ever invented. (Please pay no attention to Vlad.) They’re lightweight, breathable, don’t block out outside noise, and sound amazing — not just for the price. Amazing. Full stop. Also, there are these little foam pads that put all the pressure on your temples so that your ears don’t get crushed.
They’re also really easy to break, because the wires that run into each ear are exceedingly fragile, and I’ve destroyed at least three pairs of Porta Pros by accidentally getting the cable caught on something and ripping away violently.
So anyway, a wireless version of the Koss Porta Pro, possibly called ”Koss Porta Pro Wireless,” was just spotted in an FCC filing, as seen by Ars Technica. It looks exactly like the classic, decades-old design, except that instead of an aux cable, there’s a neck strap cable that includes a tiny battery (220mAh) and a playback controller.
What’s troubling is the filing refers to Bluetooth 4.1 support, which means the Koss Porta Pro Wireless probably don’t have a super modern Bluetooth chipset, which means they might not solve all the typical problems with Bluetooth headphones. Or maybe this is just an old model that got lost in the FCC’s overstuffed mail room and won’t be released at all.
Who knows. But I want.