There are only two rules to Cyber Monday, the other side of the Thanksgiving shopping weekend. It has to occur on Monday. (That's what the word "Monday" means. It's a day of the week.) And it has to be online, which is why the word "Cyber" is in there. If you read the phrase, or better yet say it out loud, you'll know all the rules. They are not complicated.

Yet somehow that second rule escaped the Washington Redskins organization this year. In a fit of 1997 nostalgia, tryptophan-induced hysteria, or just garden-variety stupidity, the team is offering a Cyber Monday deal for season tickets that you can only complete over the phone. Like, you have to dial a phone number. And talk to a person. It's almost amazing you're allowed to complete this call from a cellphone, really.

When you dial 301-276-6800, you're greeted by a full 45 seconds of completely out of context Redskins highlights (evidently Pierre Garçon once caught an 89-yard touchdown, which is cool, I guess) before an agent picks up to help you buy premium season tickets. It all seems like it'd be much easier to do online, especially because buying tickets is already very easy online. We've been doing this for a while, Washington.

The Redskins don't exactly have a reputation for being, let's say, "with the times." They stick vehemently to their name in the face of loud and growing criticism, they refuse to do anything in order to actually be good at the game of football, and their technological prowess clearly ended with the landline. Happy Phone Order Monday, everyone!